[Note bene: I wrote this in early November and found it today while looking through my drafts. I don't know why I never posted it. Anyway, ta da!]
After President Uchtdorf's wonderful remarks at the Relief Society Broadcast, the Parable of the Bay Leaf has become a household topic. In it, he describes his wife's ability to create wonderful and delicious meals, beautifully presented; but that she consistantly punctuates the creation with a comment such as, “I’m afraid I used a touch too much ginger,” or, “Next time, I think it would be better if I used a little more curry and one additional bay leaf.”
President Uchtdorf points out that as women, we may not appreciate the value of what we do in the world and more importantly who we are. These 'bay leaf' comments, while showing a desire to improve and create goodness and "perfection", may also clue us in to the fact that our focus is on a tiny fraction of the scene.
Enough with the generalizations.
I do this. Since my husband has pointed it out, I am amazed how frequently it occurs.
An example: I busted my butt making homemade whole-wheat bread sticks for a ward party. I juggled it between Nathanael's nap, picking up yeast when I discovered we were out, and the Halloween event that afternoon. I ran to and fro, keeping my perspective, and enjoying Nathanael all throughout the day. We finally were sitting at the party chatting and eating and I got my first bite. I said, "Oh! Next time I need to let them raise longer. It is so dense!"
Now, this was after several people had already complemented me and Nathanael was halfway through his (the ultimate complement). Michael pointed out my comment (in light of the bay leaf) and I was so surprised! I didn't even notice.
It is now becoming part of my personal culture to say things like, "Wow. I did a really great job on this!" And then I bite my tongue when I want to add my bay leaf comment.
I realize that our public culture doesn't allow for this type of comment. It doesn't expect it. And it doesn't fit into the model of self-depreciation as humility that we frequently buy into. But as I have trusted and taken the step to believe in myself--enough to verbalize it--I have felt peace.
Showing posts with label spiritual. Show all posts
Showing posts with label spiritual. Show all posts
Feast or Famine (or This is a Very Long Post)
I have a confession to make.
Although I have only updated this blog once in the last four months, I write a blog post almost every day. I write as I'm driving, I compose the perfect sentence while showering, I even imagine what I will say next while I'm standing at the sink, washing the dishes.
However, once my daydream bubble is popped and before I can make it to a keyboard, I am distracted by Real Life. This is very distressing to me, as I know that my fantastical musings are more interesting to write about than picking up the living room before the visitors arrive or rushing downstairs to do a load of laundry so that Nathanael can wear something other than his pajamas all day. However, my sense of cleanliness usually wins in the battle with my creative juices.
But! It is Naptime. That blessed gift to all mothers. And so I write.
My true topic of the day is A Really Great Idea. Or, Why I Like to Capitalize Random Words (which, in truth, are not random, but specifically chosen in order to convey more specifically my true meaning.)
So, for several reasons and because of several benevolent people, I am taking Visual Arts Studio 330R next semester!!! This class is quite possibly the best class on BYU campus, and duly coveted by all who know about it. (My husband pointed out that this does not include the vast majority of the College of Mathematics and Physical Sciences. Their loss.)
The class teaches traditional methods of hand bookbinding. Basically, I get to make my own books--the real way! Not with a stapler or three-ring binder or plastic comb binding: with real stitches! (I feel like Pinocchio the way I'm going on and on about "real.") This was all very exciting to me when my primary motivation was the artistic value of such cool books, but now I have an even better reason to be thrilled (now we're getting to the aforementioned Idea).
So, a few of you may know that I'm a huge fan of Glenn Doman and his programs of early childhood development. If you don't happen to be familiar with this amazing concept, let me give an overview.
Glenn Doman has studied brain-injured children for several decades with the intention of teaching them normal skills (mobility, speech, reading, etc.). He and his team of scientists have had such great success with these injured kids that they started out-performing the healthy kids. That led them to use similar techniques to teach the healthy kids and learn about what their brains were capable of.
In short, although we all know we don't use the full potential of our brains, Mr. Doman proposes a method to do so. He explains that brain growth is almost entirely completed by 5 or 6 years of age. He teaches that the key to using more or our brains' capacity is using it sooner. So he teaches parents to teach their babies how to read, do math, learn facts about the world, learn languages and to be physically superb. He has a school in Pennsylvania where he teaches some kids and hosts seminars for parents to learn about the programs. What the kids there are able to achieve is absolutely inspiring!
I could go on and on, but this is not the point. For more information, visit The Institutes for the Achievement of Human Potential or email me and I'll lend you my copy of his books.
The point here is, that the reading program proposes that tiny kids can learn written language in the same time frame as spoken language if it is presented to them in a way they can perceive. That is to say, the words need to be big enough because babies' visual pathways aren't developed enough to read small print. So, for moms teaching their children to read, they prepare various materials, all with 3" tall red letters and as the child's eyes develop both from practice reading and from normal development the letters get smaller and gradually switch to black to provide greater contrast.
All of this to say, I have a plan! I have a very smart baby (just as all babies are, but what mom doesn't want to brag?) and I am very excited to be able to provide materials for him as he learns to read. Of course, he won't start with books, he'll start with individual words on cards and gradually move to couplets, three-word phrases and then sentences. We'll gradually increase his vocabulary and one magical day, he'll be ready to read a whole book. And then my bookbinding skills will be truly a great boon. I will be able to re-make books with too small of print for him so that he can read them!!!
I am overjoyed!
Okay. So it's time to post this and get on with the day, (Real Life and such), but I can't shake the feeling that my enthusiasm and energy for Nathanael is much more real than any cleaning chore. And (this is a-whole-nother post but) it's so spiritually uplifting to make these plans and carry them out.
I'll write about that one while I go wash the dishes.
Although I have only updated this blog once in the last four months, I write a blog post almost every day. I write as I'm driving, I compose the perfect sentence while showering, I even imagine what I will say next while I'm standing at the sink, washing the dishes.
However, once my daydream bubble is popped and before I can make it to a keyboard, I am distracted by Real Life. This is very distressing to me, as I know that my fantastical musings are more interesting to write about than picking up the living room before the visitors arrive or rushing downstairs to do a load of laundry so that Nathanael can wear something other than his pajamas all day. However, my sense of cleanliness usually wins in the battle with my creative juices.
But! It is Naptime. That blessed gift to all mothers. And so I write.
My true topic of the day is A Really Great Idea. Or, Why I Like to Capitalize Random Words (which, in truth, are not random, but specifically chosen in order to convey more specifically my true meaning.)
So, for several reasons and because of several benevolent people, I am taking Visual Arts Studio 330R next semester!!! This class is quite possibly the best class on BYU campus, and duly coveted by all who know about it. (My husband pointed out that this does not include the vast majority of the College of Mathematics and Physical Sciences. Their loss.)
The class teaches traditional methods of hand bookbinding. Basically, I get to make my own books--the real way! Not with a stapler or three-ring binder or plastic comb binding: with real stitches! (I feel like Pinocchio the way I'm going on and on about "real.") This was all very exciting to me when my primary motivation was the artistic value of such cool books, but now I have an even better reason to be thrilled (now we're getting to the aforementioned Idea).
So, a few of you may know that I'm a huge fan of Glenn Doman and his programs of early childhood development. If you don't happen to be familiar with this amazing concept, let me give an overview.
Glenn Doman has studied brain-injured children for several decades with the intention of teaching them normal skills (mobility, speech, reading, etc.). He and his team of scientists have had such great success with these injured kids that they started out-performing the healthy kids. That led them to use similar techniques to teach the healthy kids and learn about what their brains were capable of.
In short, although we all know we don't use the full potential of our brains, Mr. Doman proposes a method to do so. He explains that brain growth is almost entirely completed by 5 or 6 years of age. He teaches that the key to using more or our brains' capacity is using it sooner. So he teaches parents to teach their babies how to read, do math, learn facts about the world, learn languages and to be physically superb. He has a school in Pennsylvania where he teaches some kids and hosts seminars for parents to learn about the programs. What the kids there are able to achieve is absolutely inspiring!
I could go on and on, but this is not the point. For more information, visit The Institutes for the Achievement of Human Potential or email me and I'll lend you my copy of his books.
The point here is, that the reading program proposes that tiny kids can learn written language in the same time frame as spoken language if it is presented to them in a way they can perceive. That is to say, the words need to be big enough because babies' visual pathways aren't developed enough to read small print. So, for moms teaching their children to read, they prepare various materials, all with 3" tall red letters and as the child's eyes develop both from practice reading and from normal development the letters get smaller and gradually switch to black to provide greater contrast.
All of this to say, I have a plan! I have a very smart baby (just as all babies are, but what mom doesn't want to brag?) and I am very excited to be able to provide materials for him as he learns to read. Of course, he won't start with books, he'll start with individual words on cards and gradually move to couplets, three-word phrases and then sentences. We'll gradually increase his vocabulary and one magical day, he'll be ready to read a whole book. And then my bookbinding skills will be truly a great boon. I will be able to re-make books with too small of print for him so that he can read them!!!
I am overjoyed!
Okay. So it's time to post this and get on with the day, (Real Life and such), but I can't shake the feeling that my enthusiasm and energy for Nathanael is much more real than any cleaning chore. And (this is a-whole-nother post but) it's so spiritually uplifting to make these plans and carry them out.
I'll write about that one while I go wash the dishes.
Rollercoasters & Readiness
Yesterday Michael was invited to the Wild Waves water and amusement park with his team at work. I decided to take the opportunity and came along with Nathanael. We had such a fun time! The wooden rollercoaster was the best--what a thrill! But even the so-called wimpy-looking rides were great fun and we both (all three) had a great day! Nathanael was such a good sport and played and laughed on the ground while his parents rode around making themselves dizzy.
As for the readiness, Michael and I are both in a state of preparation as we are speaking in Sacrament Meeting on Sunday. My mind has a thousand tracks it wants to explore, but as it gets later and later, my body is putting it's foot down--it's time for bed!
Here's a couple photos of our fun day:
As for the readiness, Michael and I are both in a state of preparation as we are speaking in Sacrament Meeting on Sunday. My mind has a thousand tracks it wants to explore, but as it gets later and later, my body is putting it's foot down--it's time for bed!
Here's a couple photos of our fun day:
A Precarious Balance
I'm still here! It's been a while since I posted--I've been busy being a mom. :)
As for adventures, it was a rainy (drippy) Seattle day today. We had a very exciting night with Nathanael which resulted in a very lazy Saturday morning. (The pancake breakfast was finally ready around 2:00 pm!)
But I've been thinking a lot about why I feel so terrible when I stay indoors all day. I read Ben Crowder's post today on a similar topic which really got me thinking about it.
I love to get out and see people, breath fresh air, move my body. I feel alive when I interact with others. But this is only part of it. The other side is accomplishing something. Each day around dinner time I do an only partly-conscious assessment of the days activities and I feel a pang of guilt if I realize that nothing tangible was accomplished. (It somehow feels more tangible, even if it's not, if it involves others.)
This poses interesting challenges as a stay-at-home mom making a concerted effort to rest more! I get to remind myself that I am still recovering from fairly major surgery less than three months ago and that I also use tons of extra calories breastfeeding and toting around my beautiful son.
This brings me to another topic I was contemplating last night: my work as a mother consists almost entirely of activities that will continuously need to be redone. For example, feeding, washing, organizing, comforting, resting, playing. The entropy in the universe being what it is, my children, husband, and I are continuously getting hungry, dirty, disorganized, distressed, tired, and bored. This is good, as it means I both have a very important job, and one that will be needed for the foreseeable future! (Read: forever.)
However, it can be frustrating as when seen from a temporal perspective I produce no tangible results. At the end of the day, every nap I put Nathanael down for, he wakes up from and every meal he eats turns into another diaper to change. Ultimately, he is healthier and happier (and bigger!) for all my efforts, but when Michael gets home at the end of the day and I look back at my 8 hours I see only maintenance, while he can show me his code and tell me what he learned while writing it.
Obviously, the answer is in the problem: lose the temporal perspective and focus on the eternal! Nathanael is far more precious than Amazon.com, or any of their programs, or even the money Michael earns there. This sounds simple, but it amazing how much energy I glean from making sure I read the scriptures at least once a day on my own. It also helps tremendously if I clean the kitchen once, and then leave it!
The real solution, though, is to rest plenty, shower every day, drink a LOT more water than I think I need, and then leave the house. On Wednesday, I had the hankering to make some cards, so I looked up a local stamp shop and off we went. I ended up signing up for a card-making class the next day, so we did the forty-five minute (one way) excursion again. It was worth it--I had a great time. But at the end of the week I was pretty tired, and I started wondering if I had swung too far in the "pushing it" direction.
As for today (Saturday), Michael took us out to eat dinner in Pioneer Square (we got gyros at a little shop on the corner of 2nd Ave S and Main St--delicious!) Then we went to Safeway and picked up some must-have-before-Sunday items. Of course, Nathanael napped for part of the trip and cooed and laughed for the other half. He is a perfect angel! By the time we got home I felt great about the day and was ready for another round of feedings and diapers!
Well, this post is getting long, and Nathanael's finished his midnight snack and is now sleeping peacefully again, so it's time for me to do the same. (A mom has the wonderful charge of making time for the spiritual when faced continually with the demands of the temporal!)
p.s. Do any veteran mothers have wisdom for me on this topic? How did you do it?
As for adventures, it was a rainy (drippy) Seattle day today. We had a very exciting night with Nathanael which resulted in a very lazy Saturday morning. (The pancake breakfast was finally ready around 2:00 pm!)
But I've been thinking a lot about why I feel so terrible when I stay indoors all day. I read Ben Crowder's post today on a similar topic which really got me thinking about it.
I love to get out and see people, breath fresh air, move my body. I feel alive when I interact with others. But this is only part of it. The other side is accomplishing something. Each day around dinner time I do an only partly-conscious assessment of the days activities and I feel a pang of guilt if I realize that nothing tangible was accomplished. (It somehow feels more tangible, even if it's not, if it involves others.)
This poses interesting challenges as a stay-at-home mom making a concerted effort to rest more! I get to remind myself that I am still recovering from fairly major surgery less than three months ago and that I also use tons of extra calories breastfeeding and toting around my beautiful son.
This brings me to another topic I was contemplating last night: my work as a mother consists almost entirely of activities that will continuously need to be redone. For example, feeding, washing, organizing, comforting, resting, playing. The entropy in the universe being what it is, my children, husband, and I are continuously getting hungry, dirty, disorganized, distressed, tired, and bored. This is good, as it means I both have a very important job, and one that will be needed for the foreseeable future! (Read: forever.)
However, it can be frustrating as when seen from a temporal perspective I produce no tangible results. At the end of the day, every nap I put Nathanael down for, he wakes up from and every meal he eats turns into another diaper to change. Ultimately, he is healthier and happier (and bigger!) for all my efforts, but when Michael gets home at the end of the day and I look back at my 8 hours I see only maintenance, while he can show me his code and tell me what he learned while writing it.
Obviously, the answer is in the problem: lose the temporal perspective and focus on the eternal! Nathanael is far more precious than Amazon.com, or any of their programs, or even the money Michael earns there. This sounds simple, but it amazing how much energy I glean from making sure I read the scriptures at least once a day on my own. It also helps tremendously if I clean the kitchen once, and then leave it!
The real solution, though, is to rest plenty, shower every day, drink a LOT more water than I think I need, and then leave the house. On Wednesday, I had the hankering to make some cards, so I looked up a local stamp shop and off we went. I ended up signing up for a card-making class the next day, so we did the forty-five minute (one way) excursion again. It was worth it--I had a great time. But at the end of the week I was pretty tired, and I started wondering if I had swung too far in the "pushing it" direction.
As for today (Saturday), Michael took us out to eat dinner in Pioneer Square (we got gyros at a little shop on the corner of 2nd Ave S and Main St--delicious!) Then we went to Safeway and picked up some must-have-before-Sunday items. Of course, Nathanael napped for part of the trip and cooed and laughed for the other half. He is a perfect angel! By the time we got home I felt great about the day and was ready for another round of feedings and diapers!
Well, this post is getting long, and Nathanael's finished his midnight snack and is now sleeping peacefully again, so it's time for me to do the same. (A mom has the wonderful charge of making time for the spiritual when faced continually with the demands of the temporal!)
p.s. Do any veteran mothers have wisdom for me on this topic? How did you do it?
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