A handsome picture of my handsome boys. I love them both so much!
A Precarious Balance
I'm still here! It's been a while since I posted--I've been busy being a mom. :)
As for adventures, it was a rainy (drippy) Seattle day today. We had a very exciting night with Nathanael which resulted in a very lazy Saturday morning. (The pancake breakfast was finally ready around 2:00 pm!)
But I've been thinking a lot about why I feel so terrible when I stay indoors all day. I read Ben Crowder's post today on a similar topic which really got me thinking about it.
I love to get out and see people, breath fresh air, move my body. I feel alive when I interact with others. But this is only part of it. The other side is accomplishing something. Each day around dinner time I do an only partly-conscious assessment of the days activities and I feel a pang of guilt if I realize that nothing tangible was accomplished. (It somehow feels more tangible, even if it's not, if it involves others.)
This poses interesting challenges as a stay-at-home mom making a concerted effort to rest more! I get to remind myself that I am still recovering from fairly major surgery less than three months ago and that I also use tons of extra calories breastfeeding and toting around my beautiful son.
This brings me to another topic I was contemplating last night: my work as a mother consists almost entirely of activities that will continuously need to be redone. For example, feeding, washing, organizing, comforting, resting, playing. The entropy in the universe being what it is, my children, husband, and I are continuously getting hungry, dirty, disorganized, distressed, tired, and bored. This is good, as it means I both have a very important job, and one that will be needed for the foreseeable future! (Read: forever.)
However, it can be frustrating as when seen from a temporal perspective I produce no tangible results. At the end of the day, every nap I put Nathanael down for, he wakes up from and every meal he eats turns into another diaper to change. Ultimately, he is healthier and happier (and bigger!) for all my efforts, but when Michael gets home at the end of the day and I look back at my 8 hours I see only maintenance, while he can show me his code and tell me what he learned while writing it.
Obviously, the answer is in the problem: lose the temporal perspective and focus on the eternal! Nathanael is far more precious than Amazon.com, or any of their programs, or even the money Michael earns there. This sounds simple, but it amazing how much energy I glean from making sure I read the scriptures at least once a day on my own. It also helps tremendously if I clean the kitchen once, and then leave it!
The real solution, though, is to rest plenty, shower every day, drink a LOT more water than I think I need, and then leave the house. On Wednesday, I had the hankering to make some cards, so I looked up a local stamp shop and off we went. I ended up signing up for a card-making class the next day, so we did the forty-five minute (one way) excursion again. It was worth it--I had a great time. But at the end of the week I was pretty tired, and I started wondering if I had swung too far in the "pushing it" direction.
As for today (Saturday), Michael took us out to eat dinner in Pioneer Square (we got gyros at a little shop on the corner of 2nd Ave S and Main St--delicious!) Then we went to Safeway and picked up some must-have-before-Sunday items. Of course, Nathanael napped for part of the trip and cooed and laughed for the other half. He is a perfect angel! By the time we got home I felt great about the day and was ready for another round of feedings and diapers!
Well, this post is getting long, and Nathanael's finished his midnight snack and is now sleeping peacefully again, so it's time for me to do the same. (A mom has the wonderful charge of making time for the spiritual when faced continually with the demands of the temporal!)
p.s. Do any veteran mothers have wisdom for me on this topic? How did you do it?
As for adventures, it was a rainy (drippy) Seattle day today. We had a very exciting night with Nathanael which resulted in a very lazy Saturday morning. (The pancake breakfast was finally ready around 2:00 pm!)
But I've been thinking a lot about why I feel so terrible when I stay indoors all day. I read Ben Crowder's post today on a similar topic which really got me thinking about it.
I love to get out and see people, breath fresh air, move my body. I feel alive when I interact with others. But this is only part of it. The other side is accomplishing something. Each day around dinner time I do an only partly-conscious assessment of the days activities and I feel a pang of guilt if I realize that nothing tangible was accomplished. (It somehow feels more tangible, even if it's not, if it involves others.)
This poses interesting challenges as a stay-at-home mom making a concerted effort to rest more! I get to remind myself that I am still recovering from fairly major surgery less than three months ago and that I also use tons of extra calories breastfeeding and toting around my beautiful son.
This brings me to another topic I was contemplating last night: my work as a mother consists almost entirely of activities that will continuously need to be redone. For example, feeding, washing, organizing, comforting, resting, playing. The entropy in the universe being what it is, my children, husband, and I are continuously getting hungry, dirty, disorganized, distressed, tired, and bored. This is good, as it means I both have a very important job, and one that will be needed for the foreseeable future! (Read: forever.)
However, it can be frustrating as when seen from a temporal perspective I produce no tangible results. At the end of the day, every nap I put Nathanael down for, he wakes up from and every meal he eats turns into another diaper to change. Ultimately, he is healthier and happier (and bigger!) for all my efforts, but when Michael gets home at the end of the day and I look back at my 8 hours I see only maintenance, while he can show me his code and tell me what he learned while writing it.
Obviously, the answer is in the problem: lose the temporal perspective and focus on the eternal! Nathanael is far more precious than Amazon.com, or any of their programs, or even the money Michael earns there. This sounds simple, but it amazing how much energy I glean from making sure I read the scriptures at least once a day on my own. It also helps tremendously if I clean the kitchen once, and then leave it!
The real solution, though, is to rest plenty, shower every day, drink a LOT more water than I think I need, and then leave the house. On Wednesday, I had the hankering to make some cards, so I looked up a local stamp shop and off we went. I ended up signing up for a card-making class the next day, so we did the forty-five minute (one way) excursion again. It was worth it--I had a great time. But at the end of the week I was pretty tired, and I started wondering if I had swung too far in the "pushing it" direction.
As for today (Saturday), Michael took us out to eat dinner in Pioneer Square (we got gyros at a little shop on the corner of 2nd Ave S and Main St--delicious!) Then we went to Safeway and picked up some must-have-before-Sunday items. Of course, Nathanael napped for part of the trip and cooed and laughed for the other half. He is a perfect angel! By the time we got home I felt great about the day and was ready for another round of feedings and diapers!
Well, this post is getting long, and Nathanael's finished his midnight snack and is now sleeping peacefully again, so it's time for me to do the same. (A mom has the wonderful charge of making time for the spiritual when faced continually with the demands of the temporal!)
p.s. Do any veteran mothers have wisdom for me on this topic? How did you do it?
Rock-a-bye Baby
One of the topics I have wanted to write down for a while now is the subject of rocking. Now, ever since Nathanael was born we have learned the fine art of rocking a baby. There are many different kinds of rocking, and each baby demands a personalized selection at any given moment of his life. For example, Nathanael may want vigorous rocking from his dad as a newborn when he is tired and gentle swaying from mom as a two-month old when he is upset.
Scientifically-minded persons, beware! There is no pattern in these variables that can be learned or --gasp!-- optimized. And what works for one baby in one sitatuation one day, may not work in a similar situation the next!
However, one humorous aspect that we have discovered about this particular stretch of parenthood is our own acclimation to the rocking. Michael and I both have noticed ourselves unconsciously rocking or swaying at times when we are not holding Nathanael! I have been especially embarrassed when I find myself doing so in a store or public area.
Conversely, the calm rhythmic motion is very soothing and is something that most adults could certainly benefit from. We can take a lesson from babies and learn to serve our bodies when they would like food, water, and sleep and not at our own convenience. We might find that they serve us much better when we attend to them promptly!
Scientifically-minded persons, beware! There is no pattern in these variables that can be learned or --gasp!-- optimized. And what works for one baby in one sitatuation one day, may not work in a similar situation the next!
However, one humorous aspect that we have discovered about this particular stretch of parenthood is our own acclimation to the rocking. Michael and I both have noticed ourselves unconsciously rocking or swaying at times when we are not holding Nathanael! I have been especially embarrassed when I find myself doing so in a store or public area.
Conversely, the calm rhythmic motion is very soothing and is something that most adults could certainly benefit from. We can take a lesson from babies and learn to serve our bodies when they would like food, water, and sleep and not at our own convenience. We might find that they serve us much better when we attend to them promptly!
Happy Birthday Dad!
Isn't he handsome? This is a good opportunity to post an old favorite picture and say I love Michael!p.s. I now call your attention to the new area of the sidebar dedicated to links to my Picasa web albums. Now you no longer need to search through old posts for links to see the sweetest baby in the world!
Hosomaki & Rolling
At various times of day during our conversations, Michael keeps asking, "Are you going to blog about that?" And the answer is usually "Yes." So I have quite a mental list of things to expound on here. The most recent (and most exciting) one happened last night.
We had just returned home from a fireside at the Bishop's home and were playing with Nathanael on the floor. Michael set him down on his belly to give him some practice strengthening his legs and as soon as he hit the blanket he rolled over! Michael set him down again after considerable celebrating and hugging him and he did it again! The second time he startled himself nearly as much as both of us! He looked so surprised to be on his back all of the sudden!
When we got out the camera though, he was content to stay on his belly and practice using his crawling muscles! :) So I don't have any pictures of the momentous occasion.
The other fun event of yesterday was Michael's birthday! We had some friends over for cake and ice cream, but when I brought the cake out, the rotating fan spun around and blew the candles out before we were even done singing!
Michael received a sushi-making kit for his birthday, and he is very excited to get started making delicious creations out of nori with gari and wasabi on the side! I am very excited to be the guinea pig that he tries his creations out on!
We had just returned home from a fireside at the Bishop's home and were playing with Nathanael on the floor. Michael set him down on his belly to give him some practice strengthening his legs and as soon as he hit the blanket he rolled over! Michael set him down again after considerable celebrating and hugging him and he did it again! The second time he startled himself nearly as much as both of us! He looked so surprised to be on his back all of the sudden!
When we got out the camera though, he was content to stay on his belly and practice using his crawling muscles! :) So I don't have any pictures of the momentous occasion.
The other fun event of yesterday was Michael's birthday! We had some friends over for cake and ice cream, but when I brought the cake out, the rotating fan spun around and blew the candles out before we were even done singing!
Michael received a sushi-making kit for his birthday, and he is very excited to get started making delicious creations out of nori with gari and wasabi on the side! I am very excited to be the guinea pig that he tries his creations out on!
Gratitude
This morning I just want to put my voice out into the void to express my thanks for all the beautiful gifts in my life:
A sweet and wonderful husband and son who love me!
A large extended family and in-laws all of whom are also my dear friends.
Many, many great friends who generously share their lives with me as we learn and grow together.
My faith in my Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ which blesses my life immeasurably.
My education and healthy mind that can absorb whatever I wish to learn!
My wonderful body that allows me to experience through my senses: the color of flowers, Nathanael's first coo's, the warmth of a hug, buttered popcorn, and salty sea air.
This beautiful planet and all it's wonders: trees, grass, mountains, the ocean, and tiny "weed" flowers growing between cement sidewalk squares.
Well, this was ironically meant to be a short "easy" post. I feel so torn: I don't want to end the list because there truly isn't an end to my gratitude. The more items I list, the more that flood my mind and my expression of them feels so incomplete. However, it is still my gratitude list for today and those who read it can do so knowing that it could easily continue on for pages.
What a wonderful life!
A sweet and wonderful husband and son who love me!
A large extended family and in-laws all of whom are also my dear friends.
Many, many great friends who generously share their lives with me as we learn and grow together.
My faith in my Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ which blesses my life immeasurably.
My education and healthy mind that can absorb whatever I wish to learn!
My wonderful body that allows me to experience through my senses: the color of flowers, Nathanael's first coo's, the warmth of a hug, buttered popcorn, and salty sea air.
This beautiful planet and all it's wonders: trees, grass, mountains, the ocean, and tiny "weed" flowers growing between cement sidewalk squares.
Well, this was ironically meant to be a short "easy" post. I feel so torn: I don't want to end the list because there truly isn't an end to my gratitude. The more items I list, the more that flood my mind and my expression of them feels so incomplete. However, it is still my gratitude list for today and those who read it can do so knowing that it could easily continue on for pages.
What a wonderful life!
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